- At school, Tahlia was bullied for being a goody two-shoes, so after graduation, she couldn’t wait to go to uni and make a fresh start
- She started partying hard, drinking and doing drugs on weekends
- After she fell in with a new group of people, she was introduced to the drug ‘ice’ and within two years she was highly addicted
- She didn’t think her drug use was an issue and when she landed a stressful corporate job and smoked ice in the bathroom, she told herself it was helping her cope
- When she ended up doing time in prison, it was the wake-up call she needed to get clean and help others instead
- Tahlia Isaac, from Townsville, Qld., shares her story of escaping addiction and finding happiness…
My hand shot up before the teacher had even finished asking the question.
“Very good, Tahlia,” she said after I gave the correct answer.
I was smiling until I noticed that all the other kids were sneering at me.
“You’re such a goody two-shoes,” one girl spat.
In high school, I didn’t feel accepted by my peers either.
They found me loud and annoying, and I struggled to fit in. I was desperate to be liked and constantly changed my personality in an attempt to achieve that.
But it never worked, and I couldn’t stand the rejection.
After finishing school at age 18, I went to university and revelled in the opportunity to start afresh.
Nobody knew me, so I could be whoever I wanted.
Thinking it was cool, I started partying hard, drinking and doing drugs, like cocaine and ecstasy, most weekends.
I’m young and everyone is doing it, I told myself.
People seemed to like this version of me, which only fuelled my partying further.
I’d often wake up in the morning with no clue what I’d done the night before.
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Then, in 2008, I was blindsided when my boyfriend broke up with me.
Unable to deal with the rejection, my partying spiralled out of control.
I fell in with a new group of people who introduced me to speed and GHB.
Shortly after, I was introduced to ice.
“It’s the best feeling you’ll ever have,” one guy told me, as he passed me the ice pipe.
I inhaled, and a few moments later, I felt like I was floating, and all my worries faded away. It made me feel amazing, and I never wanted that feeling to stop, so I kept doing it.
Within two years, I became completely addicted and was using ice almost every day.
At that time, I didn’t recognise it as a problem.
I landed a corporate job in financial services, which was quite stressful.
I told myself that the drug was helping me cope as I smoked it in the bathroom during my lunch break, all while wearing my suit.
As my drug use escalated, I surrounded myself with friends who were also using heavily, which made it feel like the norm.
I became skilled at hiding my ice addiction, so I was never caught.
But everything changed in 2016.
I found myself in a violent and controlling relationship, which exacerbated my drug use.
My work performance began to decline, and one day my boss called me into his office.
“We’re going to have to let you go,” he said.
I was devastated.
I managed to escape the relationship but it left me traumatised. It also left me without anyone to lean on, and I no longer had a steady income of my own.
Additionally, I was struggling with an ice addiction that I needed to support.
I felt that the easiest and quickest option was to start selling drugs since I already had the connections.
Then, in 2017, I was driving when suddenly blue lights began flashing behind me.
A wave of dread washed over me as I pulled over.
I’m in big trouble, I thought. Fear twisted my insides as I watched the policeman approach in my rear-view mirror.
“Please step out the car for me,” the officer instructed.
I stood trembling, as they searched my car.
“What’s this?” one of the officers asked, holding up a bag of meth.
It was game over.
How did it come to this? I thought, as I was led to their car in handcuffs.
I was charged with supplying meth and released on bail, but when I kept breaching my conditions, I was remanded in custody.
From November 2018, I spent nine months in prison, and it was the wake-up call I needed.
When my mum came to visit me the first time, it was one of the most devastating moments of my life.
“I’m so sorry,” I wept.
The time in prison allowed me to detox from ice and other drugs and reflect on the mess I had gotten myself into.
I also started seeing a counsellor, who helped me value myself more and realise my self-worth.
By the time I was released, I committed to never returning to drugs and crime.
I moved back in with my parents and started ticking things off the plan I’d written for myself in prison.
It was hard. When people found out I’d been in prison, they didn’t want anything to do with me, and nobody would employ me.
I managed to get a job without revealing my criminal past, but I was eventually fired when they discovered the truth.
“How are people expected to change and rebuild themselves if nobody wants to give them a chance?” I lamented to Mum.
At times I thought about relapsing, thinking it’d be easier than the struggle I was facing, but I stayed strong.
Instead, I turned my struggle into something positive. I saw there wasn’t a lot of support for women recently released from prison, and I wanted to change that.
I completed a postgraduate degree in criminology and criminal justice, and then I established a 12-week program called ‘Herself’ for women who have recently come out of prison.
Participants are provided with the tools and resources they need to rebuild their lives and reintegrate into their communities.
I also began doing a lot of advocacy, speaking at various events.
Everything started to fall into place after that.
In 2020, I met my partner.
My criminal past had made dating difficult, but he was understanding when I shared my story.
“We’ve all done things we’re not proud of,” he shrugged.
In time, we had two boys, now aged one and three.
I hope that by sharing my story, I can help others realise that we are more than our mistakes.
I want us to come together to celebrate growth and help people break free from the shackles of their past.
For info on Tahlia’s project visit: selfprojects.com.au
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