We open on our favourite dysfunctional couple, Jessika Power and Mick Gould, preparing to welcome their families for dinner.
After Mick romantically tells his young bride that today is going to be "a complete and utter waste of his time", he asks her with disdain why she wanted to "stay" during last night's commitment ceremony.
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Jessika of course, mature and faithful, spits complete and utter lies at him and says it's because she didn't want to leave the experiment because of "respect" and "friendship"…and somebody please give a Webster's dictionary to this chick for Christmas…
Before the dinner party even starts, Jess comments to Mick: "Let's hope Dad doesn't act like a drunk today", referring to that time Mick brutally bad mouthed her family.
And while this situation marked the death of their relationship, she decides that telling her father about it would be unwise because actually, he might "kill Mick".
While Jess works in the kitchen, Mick reads the following book:
And whichever producer bought this book for this particular scene, deserves some kind of medal...
The dinner guests finally arrive and they are just as nervous as the couple. Mick's family (his Dad and sister, Leisa) know that there's trouble in paradise and are not looking forward to it at all.
Then Jessika's Dad Troy arrives with Aunty Bec and making his big TV return: her hot brother and viral sensation, Rhys.
"We're very protective," Troy tells the cameras. "That's his baby sister, my baby girl. You know what I mean and if a man doesn't anything bad, you know what I mean? I'll follow up and I'll show him how to sheer a sheep…" and RUN MICK! RUN!
Instead of heeding our advice, "Mick takes this opportunity to clear the air."
Addressing the elephant in the room, Mick says: "Youse obviously heard what I said, umm, about the…"
"No Dad, hasn't actually heard that," Jess interrupts, warning her husband.
"Ok, righto…" Mick says, and instead of changing the subject, goes on to tell the Power's exactly what he said.
Pointing to Troy he said: "You were a drunk at the wedding and acted like a d---head and yeh, I'd said that you [pointing at Rhys] acted like a f---wit at the wedding as well."
Mick tries to defend the situation by saying that this was his "first impression and a lot of other people's first impressions" and somehow we don't think this helped.
"Well, I think you're a f---wit," Troy responds.
Speaking to the cameras, he then says: "Yeh, thanks Mick. Mick the P---." And lord, this is very awkward.
Troy doesn't think Mick has the authority to speak on the subject since they knew each other "for an hour" – and gave us insight into why he had so many drinks that night.
"I was nervous as s---, mate," he said, cementing the fact that we are indeed watching the very best of 'Straya on our TV screens.
Mick, awkwardly backtracks by saying that his first impressions had changed but Troy was having none of it - in fact, this was his "baby faced angel sent from heaven" and, now he really isn't happy…
Jess, on the other hand…
Trying to diffuse the situation, Jess says how #grateful she is that they could have this dinner together. All the people they love in the same room.
"I'm grateful that everything has gotten out on the table, and cheers," she says looking at her hostage, we mean husband.
In a sudden turn of events, no blood was shed. In fact, Both Rhys and Troy admitted to drinking too much at the wedding.
But with calm waters, there is always a sneaky rip…
And that came in the form of Troy asking: "How are youse two getting on?"
The pair reveals they are not living in the same apartment and Leisa, sees right through the whole charade.
"Mick wants someone who is genuine, [who is] not going to lie; who's honest and things like that, and that person is just not Jess."
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Meanwhile, Jessika is "really excited" about what she wants to do – and we all know what she wants to do is Dan…
So, with everything out in the open and apologies made (sort of) - all is finally right with the world.
Mick can go back to being held hostage against his will and Jessika can continue on with her adultery.
What a time, eh?