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Through the ups and downs of life, Rebecca Gibney says there’s “one thing” she’s always been able to rely on.
“It’s my utter faith that things will always get better, that this too shall pass, that grief and pain and loss are a part of life but so is joy and kindness and love,” the former Packed to the Rafters star shared in a poignant post on Instagram.
The woman responsible for teaching her that? Her beloved mum Shirley – who endured 15 years of beatings at the hands of her husband, and Rebecca’s father, Austin before he died of a heart attack in 1982 aged just 51.
Rebecca has long been candid about the difficult family dynamic of her childhood.
“My father was an alcoholic. It scarred all of us,” she previously told Andrew Denton.
“My mother shielded us a lot from it. I could remember her putting us to bed and I, quite often, would hear Dad come home but she’d always shut all the doors, so you’d hear the yelling and the shouting and the slapping but you’d never actually see it.
“When I was older, she said that, on the odd occasion, he beat her so badly she had bruises for six months.”
Despite all she endured, Rebecca said Shirley had taught her to “always be kind”, to “focus on others, be of service, and to be grateful for what I have”.
“And for someone who has dealt with the deepest kind of pain since she was child to a world of domestic violence – Mum has never wavered in her faith and her ability to put others first,” the proud daughter shared on Instagram.
The star’s beautiful tribute came as her mum celebrated her 91st birthday, something Rebecca said she was “so grateful” for as her mother continued to share her “wisdom and kindness”.
They are qualities Rebecca herself is proud to have inherited from her mum.
“We have all had some tragedy and it’s up to you to deal with it and move on,” Rebecca told the Herald Sun in a 2013 interview.
“Mum’s attitude has helped a lot. She would constantly tell us it was not our fault and she shielded us so that when Dad came home he’d beat her up.
“I’d hear it but never see it. Sometimes she had to sleep in the car but she always took it.
“In those days there was no help or shelters. You couldn’t just leave. Besides, she saw that alcoholism was the disease.
“When he was sober he was a kind, gentle person. Since knowing more about his own childhood, I understood and I also understood why, in my teens and 20s I gravitated to strong father figures because I grew up without a strong father figure.’’
Divulging more about her father’s battle with alcoholism in a 2015 interview with TV Week, Rebecca told how she used her experience to shape her acting role in the Peter Allen tele-movie, Not The Boy Next Door.
“Alcoholism is a disease and I think that is why it is portrayed so well in the mini-series because you recognise that he wasn’t a bad man, it is just alcohol that did that to him and he was a tormented soul,” she told the publication.
Earlier that same year, Rebecca shared a touching message about her mum on social media for Mother’s Day.
“If we don’t forgive, we will never grow. Just one of life’s lessons that this beautiful woman taught me. It’s better to be kind than right. That was another one. I am the person I am today because of her love,” she wrote.
“She has overcome a traumatic childhood, suffered terrible physical and emotional abuse and she is still the kindest, most compassionate woman I know. I love you Mum.”
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