Australian Survivor episode one recap: The courageous face off against the cunning

Survivors, ready, go!

From the outback to on the shores of the world’s largest ocean, the game of Australian Survivor has finally returned to where it all began in Samoa.

A remote paradise that is every bit as beautiful as it is dangerous, this new season kicked off in an epic style with an equally matched opening monologue by Jonathan LaPaglia.

”Courage against cunning, selfless against the selfish, trust against treachery…” the long-time host kicked the episode off .

With a montage of returning players that included footage of Jordie ‘Joker’ Hansen dancing on some stairs like his namesake in the billion dollar blockbuster ‘Joker’ and the icon that is Shonee who gave some very real reasons for her return: ”Inflation is a bitch and the cost of living is higher…I have bills to pay (same Shonee, same),” and a colourful cast of new characters, this is a season for new and old fans alike.

George, or should we say ‘King George’ was also quick to draw attention, referring to his return as the ”second coming.”

”I’m going to conquer the beaches as George the terrible, the second Tsar of Samoa.”

Whatever you say, George.

Things then officially kicked off with a rewards challenge for essential campsite gear, with the Heroes winning despite some dirty play by the Villains tribe.

Over at the Heroes tribe, everyone started out on happy terms but feathers were soon ruffled by animal rights activist Rogue who joked about everything from circumcising one of her tribemates (Gerry) with a machete (yikes), to telling her African American tribemate Nina (daughter of Survivor great Sandra) that she was ”probably more African American than her” to which Nina was visibly stunned. We were visibly stunned too. What a Rogue comment, pardon the pun.

(To clarify, Rogue is a white, Jewish woman).

Over at the villain’s campsite, Simon was quick to jump into action and take charge with his alpha male energy: ”It’s pretty hard to hide that I’m pretty good at everything. But this time I’m determined to keep my ego in check.” You failed at the first hurdle, Simon!

We then see George pivot towards Anjali and Jacqui whilst journalist Michael runs around camp whispering in the ears of his tribemates to vote out George.

Shockingly, he also tells the camera that he wants to ”take the scalps off” returning players, in a very loose, and clearly not well thought out statement.

Over in the main elimination challenge, our castaways really do put their bodies on the line, running, crawling, and even throwing their bodies through different stages.

Unfortunately for George and Jacqui, both were injured with a cut to the forehead and an injured shoulder. After being whisked away by the medical team for further evaluation, Jonathan told the Villains tribe that there was no guarantee either would return in time for tribal council.

And if you hadn’t guessed it already, the Heroes then fittingly won the challenge, leaving the Villains to start scrambling to decide who they’d vote out.

Sneaky Steve, the quirky 62 years young food delivery driver was quick out of the gate to bring his dreams of revenge against Shonee to reality.

”In my first season of Survivor I tried to be a villain but I was more like an apprentice villain,” Steve tells the camera.

”For the last four years I have been plotting Shonee’s downfall.”

Shonee on the other hand isn’t phased by Steve, telling the camera in a confessional that he was as ”harmful as a butterfly.”

But when it comes down to it, it is former television journalist and Real Housewive’s star Anjali Rao who is given the boot in the first blindside of the season.

Professional poker player Jacqui is also forced to withdraw from the game due to a fractured collarbone, whilst George’s fate remains up in the air…at least for now.