Being told you're pregnant with twins should be a moment of pure joy. However, for Married At First Sight bride Sarah, finding out she was pregnant 18 months ago caused nothing but heartache.
Her partner at the time had confessed he didn't want to be with the beauty specialist anymore.
"His family just never liked me," the 38-year-old tells TV WEEK.
"I didn't come from the rich side of the tracks. They wanted a real Stepford Wife for their son."
Sarah says hearing the news she was pregnant with twins filled her with sadness.
"It was soul-destroying," she says.
Despite her partner leaving her, Sarah was determined to continue with the pregnancy and raise the children on her own.
"At that point I was 37 and I thought, 'I don't know if I'll get another chance and I'll just figure it out,'" she says.
However, Mother Nature intervened to cause more heartbreak for the Melbourne resident.
"I lost one baby at about two-and-a-bit months and the second at about three-and- a-bit months," she explains.
Sarah admits she didn't tell anyone about her pregnancy, which made grieving for her babies even more difficult.
"I was definitely in a very dark place for quite a few months afterwards," she says. "I think the best way to describe it is like being in a fog. I knew I would eventually get out of it, but I just couldn't make myself do it."
Sarah says she wants to speak openly about her loss to help other women who have suffered miscarriages.
"It's considered taboo, but women need to know it's not their fault," she stresses.
Despite her grief, Sarah reveals she's keen to fall pregnant again with the right man. But with her 40th birthday fast approaching, she feels like she's running out of time.
"There's a ticking time bomb in your head going off," she explains.
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Australian Women's WeeklyFeb 14, 2019