Ten years ago, after my first marriage had broken up, my self-esteem was in tatters. Not only had my husband spent 14 years putting me down by saying I was unattractive, but after having had three young children, my breasts looked like two shriveled-up balloons.
I couldn’t imagine ever showing my body to another man. Then I had a great idea. I would have saline breast implants. All went well and my confidence was blooming. I eventually met the man of my dreams and he was very attracted to my “fantastic figure”.
We started dating and I discovered that he was a real health fanatic. He didn’t believe in inoculations or amalgam fillings. I wanted to tell him about my bust, but I realised he would be horrified by the truth. The more time we spent together the more difficult it became to tell him.
After living together for four years, we got married and I accidentally fell pregnant. The doctors told me that there was no problem with breastfeeding, so I fed the baby for three years and still my husband didn’t know about my implants.
We have been together now for over 10 years and I feel terrible pangs of guilt. I wish I could take my secret to my grave, but I know that one day he will find out — especially as one day I will need replacement surgery.
I wish I had told him the first day I met him … now it is like a time bomb that could end our relationship at any time. I have always been a super-honest person but once I withheld the truth, and now I live in fear of the consequences.
