My Kitchen Rules recap episode 14

It’s the seafood ‘king’ Josh and his offsider, Amy, up against protein pair Alyse and Matt.

There’s no love lost between these two teams, it’s a clash for the ages and after trading a few barbs it’s time to begin. Pete and Manu look pumped.

Both teams are doing seafood for entrée – oooh, controversial – so the pressure is on Josh to bounce back from his poor showing. Josh and Amy are tackling kingfish, while Alyse and Matt take on salmon. Matt salts the salmon with all the technique of our beloved #SaltBae

It’s all very stressful, but eventually the teams plate up and then head into a tiny waiting room to await their fate. Love to be a fly on the wall for that chat.

Back with the judges, and first up they taste Josh and Amy’s entrée. Colin says, “Whoever has done this understands seafood.” It’s probably going to be the best moment of Josh’s life.

But don’t get too excited guys, because the judges also dig Alyse and Matt’s entrée. The salmon is perfectly cooked.

It’s neck and neck…now on to the mains.

Josh does a speech about Spanish mackerel and how important it is to him and everyone stops listening. Then he ruins the curry paste by not cooking it for long enough. Oh he’s also struggling to boil the rice. That’s the Josh we know and love.

Over with Alyse and Matt, they’re burning up a storm as Matt confuses caramelising with burning. The shallots are meant to be caramelised, but instead they’re very burnt.

The boys are really dropping the ball today.

Josh and Amy aren’t impressed with their own efforts and I can’t blame them. It looks like something I cooked in first year uni. And that is an insult, I promise. The judges agree, they don’t like it. Bad news for the seafood lovers.

Team two suffers a similar fate with their spatchcock. It’s not cooked properly. Guy Grossi looks like he’s about to vomit and he’s also picked up on Matt’s decision to puree his burnt shallots. Major mistake Matt, MAJOR mistake.

Safe to say it’s probably even-steven now.

Dessert and it’s a battle of the pies. Josh and Amy are doing a lemon meringue pie while Alyse and Matt take on a banoffee pie with a little Pavlova. It’s a great excuse for Matt to flex his banoffee biceps while crushing up some nuts. Hands up if you’re tiring of Matt talking about his body?

Oh no, now he’s burning the banana. Add this to the burning shallots and there is a real theme to Matt’s cooking. At least he’s consistent.

Meanwhile, things are looking up for Josh and Amy. The meringue looks mouth-watering and despite a brief battle to cut even portions the dessert has come up well.

It all comes down to this. The judges sample the meringue first. They all agree that the pastry is a problem, it’s undercooked and floury. Hmm, seems looks can be deceiving. Now on to the banoffee and it’s equally underwhelming. Colin uses his beautiful Irish accent to systematically break down the banoffee. If Colin doesn’t like, I don’t like it.

Both teams stumbled at the final hurdle which means it is still too close to call. The judges deliberate for a while before scoring each dish individually. It’s a real back and forth until Pete finally puts us out of our misery by announcing that Josh and Amy are the winners. They score a grand total of 29/60, pipping Alyse and Matt’s 27/60.

Matt looks like he’s about to murder Josh, nothing a good bench press won’t sort out. Alyse just smiles while silently making a mental note of all the times Matt let her down.

Josh and Amy survive another day and now it’s on to the third and final next group and, of course, Colin Fassnidge.