Royal experts say Princess Diana would be “conflicted” about Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan’s decision to step back from the royal family

Prince Harry has always loathed the spotlight.

He was just 12 when his mother Diana, Princess of Wales, died in 1997, and he blames the paparazzi for taking her from him.

If royal-watchers were looking for proof that the pain and trauma caused by Diana’s early death is still incredibly real for Harry, the Duke’s suffering was on full display in the recent documentary filmed on their tour of southern Africa – Harry and Meghan: An African Journey.

Harry unpacked his trauma in front of the cameras, saying he still had work to do on his mental health.

“Everything that she went through and what happened to her is incredibly raw every single day,” he told ITV journalist and friend Tom Bradby.

“Every single time I see a camera, every single time I hear a click, every single time I see a flash, it takes me straight back.”

Veteran royal photographer Arthur Edwards watched the devastated Harry crumble with his very own eyes.

“People talk about Harry walking behind his mother’s coffin and that was an ordeal. But when he was brought down with his father from Balmoral and they went to look at the flowers and messages on the gates of Kensington Palace I saw his face crease up – he was so tortured and I just couldn’t take the picture.”

You’d have to be made of stone not to appreciate Harry and Meghan’s situation, trapped in a gilded cage with strict rules that they feel prevent them from doing their best work.

As a powerful woman used to running her own life, Meghan has found the transition to royal at best challenging and behind the scenes appears to have been trying to change what is a very well-oiled if archaic institution.

“I would say that Diana showed many of the same qualities – and in some ways I think both women were admirable,” notes royal biographer Penny Junor.

“On the other hand, you could say that what Meghan is doing is the equivalent of being a new recruit in a company you’ve agreed to work for and immediately trying to restructure it! But if it needs to be done, maybe that’s a good thing.”

But would Diana support her son’s move to quit his royal role?

“It is tempting to say his mother might have applauded his move – but actually I think she may have been conflicted. She spent her time preparing William for his future role, and Harry’s decision could cause havoc and ultimately be very damaging to his brother,” says Junor.

Royal biographer Christopher Wilson agrees.

“I think Diana would be heartbroken to see him in conflict with the royal family like this. She had her difficulties with them, but those largely stemmed from the failed relationship with her husband – if that had been OK, she could have hacked the rest. She believed in the royal family.

“Without Meghan, Harry would have continued doing the job he was born to do. But it’s clear that he loves her more than he loves the job and therefore must follow her wherever she leads. What’s happened is sad, but it would become a tragedy if, like Diana, Harry’s marriage failed.”

For Prince Harry at this crossroads, the most important three women in his life came into sharp focus.

There’s Meghan, who he’s determined to protect from the media snarl that had crucified his childhood.

Diana, whose motherly life lessons and legacy are echoing around his head.

And his beloved grandmother The Queen, who always stands by him – but in her statement on January 13 said that while supportive of Harry and Meghan “we would have preferred them to remain full-time working members of the royal family”.

Photographer Arthur Edwards has known Harry from the day he was born and like many who love him, had been crossing his fingers for a resolution.

“I thought the Queen might talk him out of it,” he sighs.

But in their statement the Sussex duo was firm and resolute. They had a plan. Their future was in the balance and they needed to take charge.

Could Harry and Meghan be granted their wish? Could they have their cake and eat it too? For ten heart-in-mouth days it almost looked as if they might prevail.

But on Saturday January 18, Harry and Meghan’s half-in half-out solution was quashed.

They were out, and “required to step back from Royal duties, including official military appointments. The Sussexes will not use their HRH titles as they are no longer working members of the Royal Family…. they will continue to maintain their private patronages.”

Harry greeted Her Majesty’s edict “with great sadness that it has come to this.”

WATCH BELOW: See a throwback clip of Princess Diana telling off a cheeky young Prince Harry. Story continues after video.

“It’s a very sad day for me because I thought Harry was the greatest kid of all to work with,” says photographer Arthur Edwards.

“He was always fun, unpredictable; you couldn’t take your eyes off him. He seemed to enjoy the role of Duke of Sussex. But then the last couple of years he’s just become completely withdrawn, moody and sad. He’s lost the spark that made him the popular member of the royal family.”

Read Juliet Rieden’s full analysis of Harry and Meghan’s royal departure in the February issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly, on sale now.