Sex & Relationships

What It’s Really Like To Date A Man In Uniform

10 real-life pros and cons. Because I know you've all thought about it.
Love a man in uniform

Oh yeah, we all love a good man in uniform. Cops, fire-y, army, navy and airforce guys – come at us But if you’re looking to enjoy those brass buttons for more than one night only, there are a few things you should consider first…

Pros:

1) Let’s start with the obvious. You get to check out a man in uniform without being a creepy stalker person. It’s not ‘disgusting and pervy’ if it’s your own special person.

2) I don’t like to generalise… but let’s generalise for a moment. Muscles. Men in uniform often need, and therefore have, many muscles.

3) Even card-carrying feminists can go a little bit cavewoman sometimes. If you go gaga for shows of power or strength, a bit of in-uniform role play is guaranteed to get you hot under the collar. Even if when you rip off that uniform you’re the one throwing around your power and strength. Oooh yeah.

4) Who better for a passionate career woman than a partner who knows what it takes to rise through the ranks? Plus, men in uniform are passionate about what they do because they know it’s important – stopping crime, saving lives, protecting people – so they’ll understand your passion, too.

5) They know how to follow orders. You know… if that’s your thing. #bossbitch

Cons:

1) Let’s not get all gloomy about it, but there are risks involved with working with fire, crime, war, etc.

2) You know when you perve on them strutting about in their uniform? Yeah… everyone else is perving on them too. And you can’t do jack about it. What are you gonna do, tell the general public they can’t respectfully ogle the men who are keeping your country safe? I don’t think so.

3) The smell when they undress is horrific. I mean, truly nose-corrupting. Think about it: they’re running around all day (or, if he’s a military man, for weeks on end) in the same thick, heavy, full-length uniform. They’re carrying firefighting equipment; they’re carrying armour and weapons; they’re carrying 60kg of STUFF through the Australian bush on their own backs. THEY SWEAT.

4) His job often requires him to be on call, which can make planning events tricky.

“Spontaneous trip to the Hunter Valley this weekend?”

“No can do babe, I’m on call.”

“OK, wanna go to this gig in June?”

“Ooh I think I might be away that month.”

“What date that month?”

“No I mean the whole month.”

facepalm

5) When they have a shit day, it’s probably WAY worse than your day… so don’t even think about whining

Anyway, I’ll just leave this here. Decide for yourself if it’s worth it…

(Side note: It is.)

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