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Mummy wars

It seems the more negative the article is the more hits "mummy blogs" get, argues Pat McDermott.

If I was a new mum today I might be browsing a “mummy blog” instead of one of the 27 dusty books on pregnancy, birth and child care that still sit on my bookshelves.

But are mummy blogs reliable guides to childbirth and parenting? This week Sydney newspaper columnist, Miranda Divine accuses mummy bloggers of portraying birth and child rearing as a long, thankless and painful business.

It seems the more negative the article is the more hits “mummy blogs” get which leads, nicely, to a corresponding hike in advertising rates for products and services.

This goes a long way to explaining the numerous articles on sleepless nights, sore nipples, clueless husbands and never-ending washing.

In other words, whether your birth plan goes smoothly or not, their business plan sure does.

The same critic, who writes that “motherhood is the best job in the world,” suggests “mummy blogs” are so negative they make mothers who love having kids too embarrassed to admit it.

Can mummy blogs be that bad? It was time I took a look.

I found lots of ‘life after baby’ experiences – cracked nipples, explosive nappies, fading memories of hot cups of tea and my personal favourite, the woman who fell asleep standing at the kitchen sink. (Her lovely, floppy tummy held her up!)

There were some funny and entertaining stories too:

• 9 things I wish I knew before I got pregnant (This is clearly too late for me)

• Live blog your birth journey (Do you have to type between contractions?)

• Stop feeling insecure about your vulva (Is that an order?)

• Most women don’t look like Kate when they’ve just had a baby (Phew! What a relief for the rest of us.)

• Mummy tummies (My doctor tells me it has nothing to with my five kids and everything to do with my love of red wine and chocolate. But what would he know?)

Colunnist Pat McDermott.

When my children were small, long before skinny lattes and mummy blogs were even thought of, my friends and I took turns meeting at each other’s houses.

We drank lukewarm coffee and chewed pre-loved teething rusks while 18 children lay waste to the hostess of the week’s house and garden.

After an hour of mayhem we went home feeling better about ourselves.

We had shared problems and worries, offered advice but weren’t offended if it was ignored, enjoyed a little gossip and reminded each other we were doing our best. And of course we grizzled because everybody feels better after a good grizzle. Ask any two year old.

Parenthood brings great joy but, inevitably, it brings exhaustion and sorrow too so it’s good to be prepared. The best “mummy blogs” are like a group of good friends.

I’d look out for those ones if I were you.

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