Daily Life

The worst real life obituaries: when 'don't speak ill of the dead' is more of a light suggestion

Yikes, some of these are downright vicious.

By Holly Royce

My grandmother taught me that if you can't say anything nice you shouldn't say anything at all, but were guessing these people didn't get that memo.

These mean, vengeful and strange obituaries are so bizarre you'll struggle to believe they're real.

1. "The world will be a better place without her," Kathleen Dehmlow

This surprising obituary for 80-year-old Kathleen Dehmlow quickly went viral after the excerpt from the Redwood Falls Gazette was shared online. Speaking exclusively to The Daily Mail, Kathleen's son said he and his sister wrote the obituary to help them feel a sense of closure.

"You can't believe the dysfunction of the family," he said. "They'll never know what we went through but it helped us [to write this]. We wanted to finally get the last word."

"You could write it all down in a book or turn it into a movie and people wouldn't believe what we went through."

Kathleen's sister said the obituary "hurt the family tremendously," and it should not have been written.

It has since been deleted from website legacy.com and the online version of the Redwood Falls Gazette.

Highlights from the obit include a section which explains Kathleen 'abandoned' her kids to be raised by their grandparents after running away with her husband's brother and proclaiming "The world will be a better place without her."

Ouch!

2. "She will STILL be missed," Carole Roberson

Image credit: Columbia news review
Image credit: Columbia news review

Among being remembered as an "astute business woman" and "a boundless creative," this bizzare obituary reveals Carole Roberson was a "difficult mother and a horrendous mother-in-law," - but don't worry - "she will STILL be missed".

Carole's obit also takes a cheeky jab at her spelling, saying "Her regular emails to family were often unintentionally hilarious as her typing was spotty and her typos were legendary."

Maybe Carole had a good sense of humour?

3. "Who broke her heart" and "betrayed her," Jossie Anello

Yikes, this one is terrible.

We can't help but wonder if it's the deceased, Jossie Anello, who was the one holding a grudge, or perhaps it was one of her children.

The highlighted section reads:

"She is survived by her Son, 'A.L', who loved and cared for her, Daughter 'Ninfa' who betrayed her trust, and Son 'Peter', who broke her heart."

4. "Circumcised with his Dad’s pocketknife," Chan Holcombe

This one isn't mean - just a little strange.

The obituary for Chan Holcombe, goes into all the normal memoriam details like how old he was when he died, where he had lived, where he was born... oh and, that he was "was circumcised with his Dad's pocketknife."

Perhaps a little too much information?

5. "Booze, guns, cars and younger women until he died," Mike Blanchard

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but this obituary for Mike "Flathead" Blanchard is definitely worth more.

"He enjoyed booze, guns, cars and younger women until the day he died."

Ah... go, Grandpa?

6. "Doug died," Doug Legler

Well.

There's not too much you can say about someone who's obituary is shorter than their name.

Vale, Doug.