Raising the issue of smacking among a group of parents can be like rolling grenade into the room. It’s often divisive, sensitive and emotionally fraught.
Chances are you’ll hear both sides of the argument: “My parents smacked me and it didn’t do me any harm”, “it’s the only form of discipline they understand” and “it’s up to parents how they choose to discipline their kids.”
And in the other corner: “it’s teaches them to use violence”, “it’s a parent losing control” and “there are more effective ways to discipline a child.”
But the topic moved from the private arena into the public spotlight recently when a Perth mother was arrested by police after allegedly slapping her four-year-old son in the side of his head for misbehaviour.
In the April issue of The Australian Women’s Weekly, we put the story of the 34-year-old mother’s arrest under the microscope. We speak to a witness, experts and take a closer look at what the law says.
Then there’s the tricky area of context: an occasional smack on the legs or bottom for a child who runs onto the road is clearly different from routine beatings. But where do we as a society draw the line?
Child rearing expert Robin Barker and child psychologist Michael Carr-Gregg weigh into the debate, while you may be interested to find out the stances of Prime Minister Tony Abbott and other high-profile people.
We also examine the specific circumstances that led the mother, whom we call Kate as she did not wish to be named, to allegedly lash out at her child. And, on the other hand, the reason behind witness Janet’s decision to report it to police.
Both Kate and Janet have faced criticism and judgement over the incident, which goes some way to explaining why they don’t wish to be identified.
The family did not have any history of violence nor any contact with child protection services, according to Kate’s husband John*.
In this feature, we also consider how the case was handled: Kate’s children were reportedly more traumatised, after all, from witnessing her being arrested at the family home and driven away in a paddy wagon that from the original incident.
**Names have been changed to protect the identity of those involved. *
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